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1、WIGGLEROOMBYDAVIDFOSTERWALLACEMARCH92009LaneDeanJr.withhisgreenrubberpinkiefingersatathisTingletableinhischalk’srowintherotesgroup’swiggleroomdidtwomereturnsthenanotheronethenflexedhisbuttocksheldtoacountoftenimaginedawa

2、rmprettybeachwithmellowsurfasinstructedinientationthepreviousmonth.Thenhedidtwomereturnscheckedtheclockrealquickthentwomethenbedowndidthreeinarowthenflexedvisualizedbewaydowndidfourwithoutlookinguponceexcepttoputthecompl

3、etedfilesmemosinthetwoOuttrayssidebysideupinthetoptieroftrayswherethecartboyscouldgetthemwhentheycameby.Afterjustanhourthebeachwasawinterbeachcoldgraythedeadkelplikethehairofthedrowneditstayedthatwaydespiteallattempts.Th

4、enthreemeincludingone1040AwherethedeductionsfA.G.I.wereaddedwrongtheMartinsburgprintouthadn’tcaughtithadtobeamendedononeoftheFm020Csinthelowerlefttraythenalotofthesameinfmationfilledoutontheregular20whichyoustillhadtodoe

5、venifitwasjustacrespondenceauditthefilegoingtoJolietinsteadoftheDistricteachcodefwhichhadtobelookeduponthepulloutthinghehadtoscootthechairawkwardlyovertopulloutalltheway.Thenanotheronethenaplummetinginsideofhimasthewallc

6、lockshowedthatwhathe’dthoughtwasanotherhourhadnotbeen.Notevenclose.May171985.LdJesusChristhavemercyonmeaposinner.CrosscheckingW2sfthereturn’sline8offtheplaceintheMartinsburgprintoutwheretheperfationifyouwantedtoseparatet

7、hething’ssheetswentrightthroughthedatayouhadtoholditupagainstthelightalmostsometimesguesswhichhischalkleadersaidwasachronicbugwithSystemsbutthewigglerwasstillaccountable.Thejokethisweekwas:HowwasanI.R.S.roteexaminerlikea

8、mushroomBothkeptinthedarkfedhseshit.Hedidn’tknowhowmushroomsevenwkedifitwastruethatyouscoopedwasteonthem.Sheri’scookingwasn’twhatyouwouldcallatthelevelofaddingmushrooms.Thenanotherreturn.Therulewasthemeyoulookedatthecloc

9、ktheslowerthetimewent.Noneofthewigglersweawatchexcepthesawthatsomekeptthemintheirpocketsfbreaks.ClocksFridayhe’dhadtheleast20sofanyoneinthechalk.Nobody’dsaidanything.Allthewastebasketswerefullofthecurledstripsofpaperfrom

10、theaddingmachines.Everyone’sfacewasthecolofwetleadinthefluescentlight.Youcouldmakeasemiprivatecubicleoutofthescreensliketheteamleaderhad.Thenhelookedupdespiteallbestpriintentions.Infourminutesitwouldbeanotherhourahalfhou

11、rafterthatwasthetenminutebreak.LaneDeanimaginedhimselfrunningaroundonthebreakwavinghisarmsshoutinggibberishholdingtencigarettesatonceinhismouthlikeapanpipe.Yearafteryearafacethesamecolasyourdesk.LdJesus.Coffeewasn’tallow

12、edbecauseofspillsonthefilesbutonthebreakhe’dhaveabigcupofcoffeeineachhwhilehepicturedhimselfrunningaroundtheoutsidegroundsshouting.Heknewwhathe’dreallydoonthebreakwassitfacingthewallclockintheloungedespiteprayersefftcoun

13、tthesecondstickoffuntilhehadtocomebackdothisagain.againagainagain.Theimaginedsoundmadehimrememberdifferenttimeshe’dseenpeoplerippaperinhalf.Hethoughtofacircusstrongmantearingaphonebookhewasbaldhadahlebarmustacheweastripy

14、allbodyswimsuitlikepeopleweinthedistantpast.LaneDeansummonedallhiswillbedowndidthreereturnsinarowbeganimaginingdifferenthighplacestojumpoffof.Hefeltinapositiontosayheknewnowthathellhadnothingtodowithfiresfrozentroops.Loc

15、kafellowinawindowlessroomtoperfmrotetasksjusttrickyenoughtomakehimhavetothinkbutstillrotetasksinvolvingnumbersthatconnecttonothinghe’lleverseecareaboutastackoftasksthatnevergoesdownnailaclocktothewallwherehecanseeitjustl

16、eavethemantheretohismind’sowndevices.Tellhimtopuckerhisbuttthinkbeachwhenhestartstogetantsy—thatwouldbejustthewdthey’duseantsylikehismother.Lethimfindoutintime’sfullnesswhatajokethewdwashowitdidn’tcomeanyplaceclose.He’da

17、lreadydustedthedeskwithhiscuffmovedhisinfantson’sphotoinitsrattlylittleframewherethefrontglassslidabitifyoushookit.He’dalreadytriedswitchingthegreenrubberoverdoingtheaddingmachinewithhislefthpretendinghe’dhadastrokewasbr

18、avelysoldieringon.Therubbermadethepinkie’stipalldamppalebeneathit.ThebeachnowhadsolidcementinsteadofsthewaterwasgraybarelymovedjustquiveredalittlelikeJellOthat’salmostset.UnbiddencamewaystokillhimselfwithJellO.LaneDeantr

19、iedtocontroltherateofhisheartbeat.Hewonderedifwithenoughpracticeconcentrationyoucouldstopyourheartatwillthesamewayyouholdyourbreath—likethisrighthere.Hisheartratefeltdangerouslyslowhebecamescaredtriedtokeephisheadincline

20、dbyrollinghiseyeswayupcomparedtheratetotheclock’ssecondhbutthesecondhseemedimpossiblyslow.Thesoundofrippingpaperagainagain.Somecartboysbroughtyoufileswitheverythingyouneededsomedidnot.Thebuzzertobringacartboywasjustunder

21、theirondesk’sedgewithawiretrailingdownoneofthedesk’ssideslittleweldedonlegbutitdidn’twk.Atkinssaidthewigglerwho’dbeenatthedeskbefehimwho’dgottransferredsomeplacehadpressedonitsomuchitburnedthecircuit.Smallstrangeindentat

22、ionsinrowsontheblotter’sfrontedgewereLaneDeanhadrealizedtheprintsofteeththatsomebodyhadbentpressedrealcarefullyintotheblottersothattheindentationswentwaydownstayedthere.Hefelthecouldunderst.Itwashardtokeepfromsmellinghis

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