《老友記》第一季劇本全集【雙語】【中英對照】

1、101 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot-The Uncut Version)[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!Joey:

2、 Come on, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?(They all star

3、e, bemused.)Phoebe: Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not hav

4、ing sex.Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.[Time Lapse]Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.Ch

5、andler: Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone... there.Joey: Instead of...?Chandler: That's right.Joey: Never had that dream.Phoebe: No.Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don'

6、;t know what to do, everybody starts looking at me. Monica: And they weren't looking at you before?!Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird,

7、 because- she never calls me![Time Lapse, Ross has entered.]Ross: (mortified) Hi.Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed

8、 my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...Chandler: Cookie?Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today. Joey: Ohh.Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.Ross

9、: Thanks.Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)Ross: No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay?Phoebe: Fine! Be murky!Ross: I'll be fine, alright?

10、 Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.101 101 試播 試播沒什么好說的！他不過是我的同事！少來了，你和那個(gè)人一起出去！拜托，和你交往的男人一定有問題！打住，喬伊，嘴下留德。他駝背？既駝背又帶假發(fā)？慢著，他吃粉筆嗎？我只是不想你重蹈我和卡爾的覆轍。各位別急，這不算約會(huì)。我們不過是出去吃晚餐，而且不做愛。聽起來好像是說我的約會(huì)。記得中學(xué)時(shí)代的夢，我站在自助餐廳，突然發(fā)現(xiàn)自

11、己全身赤裸。我做過那樣的夢。我低頭一看，看見有一支電話……在那兒。而不是……？沒錯(cuò)。我沒做過那樣的夢,沒有。那支電話突然響起，而我不知道怎么辦，每個(gè)人都開始望著我。他們以前不看你嗎？！終于，我認(rèn)為我應(yīng)該接，結(jié)果是我媽打來，我感到很奇怪，因?yàn)槲覌尣辉蜻^電話給我！嗨。這家伙向我打招呼時(shí)我就想自殺。你還好吧？我感覺有人把手伸入我的喉嚨，抓起我的腸子，從我的口中取出，然后綁在我脖上……餅干？卡羅今天把她的東西搬走了。- 我?guī)湍闩荼Х龋x了。

12、不要……別清理我的靈氣?？墒恰瓌e碰我的靈氣就是了。Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV

13、 and are trying to figure out what is going on.]Monica: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it. Chandler: (imitating the characters) Tuna or egg salad? Decide

14、!Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me! (The scene on TV has change

15、d to show two women, one is holding her hair.)Phoebe: If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off. Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants. Joey: I say push her down the stairs. Phoebe, Ross, Chan

16、dler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!(She is pushed down the stairs and everyone cheers.)Rachel: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it's like, all o

17、f my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wann

18、a be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.Rachel: Look Daddy, it

19、9;s my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica. Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...Rachel: Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybe I don't need your

20、money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!![Time Lapse, Rachel is breating into a paper bag.]Monica: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things... Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits a

21、nd kittens, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens... La la la la...something and noodles with string. These are a few...Rachel: I'm all better now.Phoebe: (gr

22、ins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!Monica: Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life. The whole, 'hat' thing.Joey: (comfo

23、rting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!Joey: What, like there's a

24、 rule or something?(The door buzzer sounds and Chandler gets it.)Chandler: Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound.Paul: (over the intercom) It's, uh, it's Paul.很眼熟?？傊?我必須離開。我開始想，我為何這么做？我為誰這樣做？于

25、是我不知該走往何處，我知道你我日漸疏遠(yuǎn)。但是你是我在這個(gè)城市，認(rèn)識的唯一一個(gè)人。好像是唯一沒受邀參加婚禮的人。這件事就甭提啦。我猜他送她一臺(tái)管風(fēng)琴，她肯定不喜歡，金槍魚還是雞蛋沙拉？快決定！我要擁有克莉絲汀擁有的一切。爸，我不能嫁給他……對不起，我只是不愛他。對，是我的問題！如果我沒了頭發(fā)，還不如去死。她不該穿那條褲子。我建議推她下樓，推她下樓！推她下樓！推她下樓！爸，你聽我說……大家這樣評價(jià)我這一輩子：你是一只鞋……今天我倒想看看如果